Anytime you encounter something new, it’s common to feel alone — to feel like everyone else is navigating this experience with ease, while you are struggling to make sense of its challenges. The prenatal and postpartum periods are no exception.

During the first trimester, you might deal with nausea, exhaustion, and worry. As your belly grows and your body changes in the second and third trimesters, you may feel fear about the birth process or anxiety about baby feeding. Then, after the baby is born, life really gets crazy. Yes, there is bliss, but there is also soreness, sleeplessness, and a new level of fatigue you never knew was possible — all while caring for a helpless, tiny human.

Especially as the pandemic continues, parents are enduring this parenting journey at home, largely by themselves. It’s no wonder thoughts like, “Was it a mistake to have a baby?” take over the mind. But what if you could connect with other moms who are in the same stage as you? What if you shared your story and someone else said, “Me, too”? What if you knew you weren’t alone because you were part of a community? This is what our prenatal and postpartum support groups provide.

Magnolia Birth House, and our sister company, The Gathering Place, have partnered with Gloria Lopez, owner of Beyond the Birth, to offer free support groups. A psychotherapist specializing in maternal and infant mental health, Gloria facilitates trimester-specific prenatal groups through a program called “In the Round.” She also leads Footsteps, which is our long-standing postpartum support group. All of these groups currently meet online because of the pandemic, but we hope to offer in-person support again as soon as it is safe.

How Do the Prenatal Support Groups Work?

In traditional prenatal care, a client starting care in the first trimester will have 10-16 one-on-one, in-person visits with their provider for health assessments and counseling. These visits can be as short as 15 minutes — leaving lots of space for questions and uncertainty. “In the Round” groups offer pregnant mamas the option to join weekly educational and listening sessions with a small group of other pregnant folks who are at the same stage of pregnancy as they are.

Our prenatal groups are split up by trimester and focus on holistic wellness as we hold space for all the joyous and messy parts of pregnancy. During each session, Gloria covers a planned topic, with the material ranging from normal pregnancy symptoms to birth preferences to baby feeding methods. She also allows time for moms to bring up anything that’s worrying them or mention areas where they need support. In addition, Gloria is a Certified Lactation Counselor and a Baby-Led Sleep and Well-Being Specialist, so she often listens to concerns about breastfeeding or newborn sleep, and she is happy to answer questions about those areas.

“During the sessions, we do some movement, such as prenatal yoga or prenatal stretches,” Gloria explained. “We often incorporate relaxation, deep breathing, mindfulness, and meditation. I want moms to feel like they’re getting tools to manage stress and anxiety. It’s important during pregnancy because any stress they have is affecting their babies, and there will be better outcomes overall if they can manage stress and keep stress low.”

What Happens During the Postpartum Support Group?

Regardless of how prepared you are or how much you looked forward to pregnancy and your baby's birth, the postpartum period will include some unexpected highs and lows. Footsteps is a weekly postpartum support group where you can be heard, seen, and accepted.

Using a peer support model, Gloria begins each meeting by asking moms to share their highs and lows — a starting point that opens up conversations and topics. Moms have opportunities to ask questions or voice concerns, and Gloria often provides information and resources.

“If a mom is new, I ask her to share her birth story, if she feels comfortable with that,” Gloria said. “I might follow up by asking, ‘What has postpartum been like?’ A lot of things come up, and sometimes moms get emotional and cry. It’s very vulnerable, but I always let them know that it’s OK to feel whatever you’re feeling.”

What Are the Benefits of Virtual Support Groups?

Community

In general, one of the biggest pros of support groups – whether in person or virtual — is that they let you know you’re not alone. When you’re home by yourself, in your house with your baby, it’s easy to convince yourself that you’re the only one who’s struggling, and the negative self-talk becomes overwhelming. However, when you’re in community through a support group, you can hear other people's stories. There’s a palpable relief when you can say, “There isn’t something wrong with me. This is a common experience.”

Knowledge

Because our groups are led by a trained therapist, participants learn about what’s normal and what’s not. For example, Gloria spends a significant amount of time educating participants about perinatal mood and anxiety disorder (PMAD), which is the most common complication of childbirth. The perinatal period is defined as any time throughout a pregnancy and up to 12 months postpartum. She also provides a free assessment tool on her website and gives resources and referrals to anyone who is concerned about their score.

Access

With our virtual groups, we are able to support moms for whom distance or traveling is a barrier. Some parents cannot travel long distances to in-person meetings, are unable to take time off from work, or are juggling commitments related to family responsibilities. During the postpartum period when exhaustion and overwhelm are high, driving anywhere can be really difficult. Virtual support groups allow moms to connect from their homes, where they feel less pressure to get dressed or put on makeup (although it’s not necessary to do those things for in-person meetings, either!).

Anonymity

Support groups offer the chance to be very vulnerable about sensitive topics. Therefore, for moms who want some anonymity, that is available through online meetings. There is never a requirement to turn cameras on. Participants are always welcome to speak only via audio if that’s what makes them comfortable.

How Do I Attend the Prenatal and Postpartum Support Groups?

Virtual groups operate on the following schedule:

• In the Round | First Trimester: 12-2 p.m. every Sunday

• In the Round | Second Trimester: 6-8 p.m. every Tuesday

• In the Round | Third Trimester: 6-8 p.m. every Thursday

• Footsteps | Postpartum: 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. every Thursday

Our support groups are completely free, but we do ask you to register in advance at this link: https://www.theplacewegather.com/support-groups.